"cozy Pikmin in a snowy cloudy wintry place 🌸❤️"

originally created October 13, 2023 ✦ republished February 8, 2025

(Originally posted on Instagram, Mastodon. This retroactive post is copied from the Instagram post.)

It's done!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 I was thinking of adding an additional lighting effect so that it feels like there's a yellow room light on inside, but I what I tried doing looked gross so I ditched that idea. But I think this still looks really cool!!! Do you also think this looks really cool!!!!!!!

It's been so long since I've posted stuff regularly. It's been so long since I've drawn regularly as well, and I wonder if that's why I feel like "bleh, why do I care so much about this art-blog thing" as I write this post. Should I just make myself draw and post more often? Or will forcing myself instead kill any spark that was left in me?

This evening I caught myself wondering, once again, if perhaps there were things I was doing better in the past. Perhaps there were lessons I had already learned, but that I had misunderstood; or that I had tried to apply in the wrong ways in the wrong places at the wrong times, because I was too small and ignorant to know what I was supposed to do with them. What happened to passion? What happened to making websites, making things with intention, being invested in things? Have my emotions just been worn too much for me to be able to feel those things I used to feel?

I definitely don't miss saying things like "I say 'I' too much" or "maybe I'm just saying hogwash". There's things like that that just make me think, "goddammit, what the hell, that's so fucking dumb". I think with most things, you've only really learned them through experience—learning things "the easy way v.s. the hard way" is B.S., because if you learn things "the easy way", all you'll end up doing is just repeating what someone else is saying without being able to verify whether what they mean actually makes sense. But I digress. Sometimes it feels like time is mean, because it makes you get lost and not remember where the good things are. I'm lucky I have those memories, at least! One of them reminded me that maybe, when I think "I want to make 'caring' and 'thoughtful' things", what I really mean is "I want precision".

Which is why I'm putting that Pikmin fancomic idea I've been slogging through on the backburner, like basically everything I wanted to do before. I just hope it doesn't slip through the cracks and fall irretrievably deep into the gutter of the time that will pass and cover it all in haze, the way it's done with basically everything I wanted to do before.

And that's my winding ridiculous spiel! Maybe I should actually explain what I'm even talking about with this "fancomic fancomic" schiz. I wonder what kind of response it would receive?....